Bumper Stickers

You are driving to close. I can see your bald spot.

If you can read this, I can deploy your air bag!!!

If you can read this, you're in range.

If you can read this, thank a teacher.

If you can read this bumper sticker you are driving too close.
....and the answer is: If your bumper sticker wasn't so damned small I wouldn't have to drive so close to read it!

(Front Bumper) If you can read this, I didn't hit you hard enough.

This truck has been in 15 accidents... and hasn't lost one yet.

YES! This is my truck. NO! I won't help you move!

There are two kinds of drivers; those who make dust and those who eat it.

Faster than a speeding ticket.

I don't drive fast. I fly low.

0-60 in 15 minutes!

I don't drink. It dulls the drugs.

Want to be somebody? Don't drive after drinking.

Spare the fenders, save the trees, give a sober friend the keys.

Hang up and drive!

Hey idiot! You're driving a car, not a phone booth.

If you're stupid, and you know it, honk your horn.

Horn Broke. Watch for finger!

I'm wondering if you have any horns with goofy songs?

I brake for no apparent reason.

You are right where you belong, behind me!

If everything is coming your way, then you're in the wrong lane.

I hate bumper stickers!

Stop Reading My Bumper Stickers and DRIVE!

Give blood and you too can get a free bumper sticker.

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

This is not an abandoned car.

You have to be really secure to be seen in this car.

No Radio - already stolen!

This car is designed by a computer, built by a robot, driven by a moron.

High beams were made to piss people off!

They keep saying the right person will come along. I think a truck hit mine.

I love uranus.

Everything I need to know I learned in prison.

Never judge a girl by her bumper sticker.

GIMMIEABREAK!

I'd rather be fishing!



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